As college admission becomes increasingly competitive and admission rates drop to record lows, I’ve noticed more and more Cathedral students around campus with the word “STRESSED” practically tattooed across their foreheads, with empty coffee cups, mismatched socks, and impressive dark bags under their sleep-deprived eyes. Last week I heard two juniors, their knees buckling from the weight of their six AP classes, comparing who got more sleep the night before. One had slept 3 hours, and the other only 2.5. The weather was beautiful and beach-worthy last weekend, but I know students who didn’t leave the house because of homework, SAT/ACT studying, and applications for academic summer programs. High school has caused kids to miss out on social events, spend lunch and break in the library, and even just feel generally unhappy. But as a senior who is admitted to college, I’m here to tell you that it doesn’t have to be this way– that it shouldn’t be this way. You can get into college without sacrificing your mental health; you can be successful in high school and enjoy these four years. Here’s what I’ve learned:

1. Do not take yourself too seriously. I consider this the golden rule– the key to high school happiness and success in high school. Working hard in high school is essential, but remember that you are indeed a high school student. You’re awkward, you say and do things you’ll likely regret in the future, you eat PB&J and somehow get it on your white polo– you’re a teenager. Teenagers, by definition, are goofy. Embrace this fact, and don’t try too hard to change it. Someday you can become one of those stodgy adults who wears neutral colors, works in a cubicle, and makes small talk about the weather. Today though, your voice cracked when you were singing at Mass and you unintentionally wore socks that didn’t match. It’s okay– accept your teenage-ness.
2. Don’t limit yourself. This rule goes hand-in-hand with rule number one. Even though you are a teenager, don’t consider yourself just a teenager. It’s easy to fall into the daily routine of high school and feel like you can’t accomplish much until after graduation, but this shouldn’t be the case. You aren’t confined to the four walls of a classroom, though it can feel like that sometimes. Don’t limit your abilities to high school– it’s a big world with many opportunities.
3. Treat your teachers like people. Sometimes we see our teachers as emotionless, homework-assigning robots (some more so than others). Surprisingly though, teachers are actually real, living, breathing human beings! I know, I know– pretty strange. But in all seriousness, try to form relationships with your teachers. You’ll probably discover that a lot of them are actually pretty cool, and it will often help you in their classes. Ask them how their days are going. Ask how their dog/kid/ garden/ wedding-planning is doing. Treat them like people.
4. Pay attention in class. It sounds like the simplest, most obvious key to doing well in school, but I know I’m not the only one who has reasoned with myself, “I’ll just play Candy Crush or go on Pinterest during the lecture, because I can read the chapter at home!” At home though, it’s easy to find even more distractions to avoid studying, and teaching yourself the material is never as effective as simply paying attention in class. Paying attention to the lecture ensures that you actually learn the material; it will save you from stressful cramming the night before a test.
5. Participate in school events. Sporting events, school dances, service trips, rallies, spirit days… I promise that attending and participating in school events won’t make you “uncool.” In fact, these school events are great opportunities to get to know and like your classmates. Even if you’re busy studying, or if cheering at a soccer game or dressing up as a tacky tourist during prom week is out of your comfort zone, I still encourage you to try to participate. I understand that after a long week at school, sometimes a night of Netflix on the couch sounds more appealing than sophomore movie night, but these activities, where you are surrounded by classmates, will become some of your most memorable high school moments.
6. Be passionate. You know when someone starts to discuss something they love, and their eyes light up and they can talk for hours? It’s when we are passionate that we truly come alive. Maybe it’s a sport, music, international affairs, computers, writing–whatever. Become passionate about anything, about everything. My passions ultimately opened doors for clubs, internships, and college, and when you’re doing something you’re passionate about, it doesn’t feel tedious.
7. Put your phone down. Technology and social media are fun, don’t get me wrong, but they can quickly become excessive and time-consuming. Being glued to your phone can hinder social interaction, and it also forces you to constantly compare yourself to other people and what they post. Stop stalking Kylie Jenner on Instagram and try to strike up a conversation with someone new. Quit obsessively checking your friends’ Snapchat stories and go ask your mom how her day was. When I spend time away from my phone, I often find myself with a lot more open time, feeling happier and more aware of the world around me.
8. Get to know yourself– and be that person. To stay sane in high school, it’s essential to know who you are, what you like/dislike, who you want to be. If you know that you aren’t interested in art history, don’t sign up for AP art history, even if you think it’ll look good on college applications. If you hate tennis, don’t force yourself to join the team, even if you’ve been on it in past years. When you know yourself, you can better manage your time and invest in things you actually enjoy. I’m sometimes tempted to roll my eyes when I hear the cliché advice “Be yourself,” but high school is a lot more pleasant if you heed the suggestion.